This won’t be a gross post. Just wanted to put that out there. I’m not going to talk about intimate things here, and I won’t be discussing uncomfortable subjects. But this will be all about trying to conceive and the journey thus far. I went back and forth between whether I wanted to write about this on my blog, but Mondays have always been about my personal life, and since this is obviously very personal to me, it makes sense. I may start up a separate blog later, but I don’t know. Mostly it would be a forum for me to express my thoughts (I’ve always been the diary sort of girl), and for my family and friends to know what’s up in my journey.
One other thing: You don’t have to tell me; I know that most people wait awhile before they make any announcements and before they discuss these things. I’m well aware. I realize that I could joyously announce a pregnancy in the next few months and then have to announce a miscarriage. I’ve done all the research. The numbers are staggering. Did you know that about 25% of all pregnancies end in miscarriage? That is absolutely depressing. You’d think that with all the medical knowledge now that it would be so much less, but it’s true. So obviously I understand that, and actually, that’s one of the reasons why I do want to document my journey. I’m not the kind of person who will be able to wait for three months to say that I’m pregnant, I’m just not. Patience isn’t a strong suit, and I am definitely known for getting my hopes up, even if I know there’s a great chance of them crashing down. That being said, if I do have a miscarriage, or if I’m not able to conceive, I’m going to want the support of the people around me. I don’t have a mass following my any means, so the people who read this likely care about me, or are at least interested in what I have to say. Or, they’re a creeper. One of those.
And finally, this won’t be the sole purpose of my Monday blogs from now on, I promise. If I find myself getting carried away, I pledge to you now that I will start a new blog for people who want to read that! You have my word.
So what’s up now? Well, we’ve gone through the exciting first month of TTC (trying to conceive), getting hopeful, over analyzing every tiny thing that could be a sign, and finding out that no, my baby wasn’t in that batch. It was fun, stressful, and exciting. Jason and I learned a lot, having been doing a ton of research on everything from midwives and home births, to knowing the signs and helpful tricks 😉 We just recently watched the documentary “The Business of Being Born.” I recommend it! I’ve loved the idea of a home birth for awhile now, and some of the information presented in that movie was very very interesting. I definitely think they presented the case of having a hospital as a backup very well though. Hospitals aren’t evil, I never thought that, but considering many things, as of now I’m leaning towards a home birth. That’ll be another blog at another time, I’m sure. In the past two months I’ve also had fun with all my firsts! My first day I took prenatal vitamins was well documented:
As was buying my first pregnancy test (thought I didn’t use it this time around):
I’ve created a “Baby” folder in my Hotmail account (every single email has a place. If you’ve emailed me in the past 8 years there’s a 99% chance I have it), talked to people about hospitals in the area, and used Google about pregnancy so much that simply typing in “How” elicits at least four suggestions on how to do something or other with having a baby. I’ve learned that there are dozens of ways to track ovulation and that every pregnancy and every women in different, which of course leads me to “Why bother?” Well, that’s my highly logical head talking. My heart is saying that this is all a part of the process. The excitement and dread, the fun and anticipation, the research and analyzing, the advice and forums, it’s all a part of the process (in this century), and honestly, I kind of love it. So, I’m going with my heart. Stay tuned.