I’m not in a big hurry to adopt. It’s not because as new foster parents we have a home full of girls (3, if you haven’t heard the news. An 11 year old, 8 year old and 3 year old) and I can’t imagine more. It’s not because I’m pregnant (because I’m not), and it’s not because I have a desire to wait for my child.
Being a foster parent is amazing, and we have been blessed with a wonderful sister group, wonderful DCS workers, and wonderful communication with our little ones’ family. It really couldn’t have been a more perfect arrangement for us, and I definitely give God all the credit there. He knew what we needed, and even though I freaked out a little after we accepted the placement (but before they came), it’s worked out better than I ever hoped. We love these girls, and it will be hard for us to see them go someday, but we know that their family loves them so we are very hopeful for their futures. One thing being a foster parent has not done for me though is lessen my desire to have kids of my own. Yes, I am now a mom. It doesn’t matter what your opinion is on that, I am a mom now, and will always be. Motherhood is a heart issue just as much as a tummy issue, and I have learned these past two months that no matter what, from now on I get to be included in Mother’s Day celebrations because I am officially in that club. So , yes, I am a mom, and it’s been spectacular, but I still want one of my own, to keep.
I’m not in a hurry though. Do you know why?
I’m not in a big hurry to adopt because I know if I am waiting, it’s because my little child isn’t ready yet. Maybe they haven’t even been conceived. God knows exactly which child is meant for me, and there is no sense in me rushing anything, because it will work out the way it is supposed to. Yes, I was a little bummed that it’s been a month and a half and we still haven’t reached our goal of $9,000 (we are at about $5,300, and we need to get to $9,000 before we can become a “waiting family” and be matched with a baby), I’ll admit it. I have come to terms with the fact, though, that I am not in control, and that the One who is in control is a whole lot smarter than I am. So it’s a good thing. It’s good that we haven’t raised the money yet, and it’s good that birth-moms haven’t seen our profiles, because it means I know without a shred of doubt that our baby isn’t ready yet, and I’ll know when she is (I always picture a girl, although I’d happily have a boy too!) that we will be ready too. So we wait.
In the meantime, I am getting some very good mommy-practice.
If you’d like to support our adoption, here is the link: YouCaring- Jason and Sarah-Marie Smith
Every person who contributes will have their name written on a puzzle piece that we will glue together and hang in our baby’s room. This way they will always know how wanted and loved they were, not only by us, but by so so many friends, family, and strangers.